On Discovering Newness of Life

Diana Beebe, Mermaids Don't Do Windows, MDDW, Diana Beebe's Blog, science fiction, fantasy, Young adultFor the last several months, I’ve been feeling like a real person again. I’m Diana, mom to two amazing daughters, and writer. I don’t have to define myself by whatever status of life I’ve found myself situated in. I don’t like the other W word. It makes me feel old.

I’m not old. I have a few decades still to experience and many stories to write.

A couple of months ago, I was talking with my dear friend who joined the club that no one wants to join before I did. She was considering going out into the world of dating. Her father-in-law had told her not long after her husband passed that she should date as soon as she was ready. He expected it. She was too young not to. But she was nervous, understandably so.

“What if it leads to more? What if I want to remarry someday?” she said.

“Get a prenup,” I said. The words tumbled from my mouth as if they were a natural thing to say. “If you remarry someday, get a prenuptial agreement. Protect the things that should go to your kids, because you and your dear husband worked hard for over 20 years to be where you are.”

Wow. These were words Steve said to me before he passed.

I hadn’t thought about that conversation in many months. It was a talk we had that had ticked me off. He was my husband, my best friend, my soulmate, and he was telling me to get a prenup! What nerve! He’d said that it was the practical and right thing to do, whether I wanted to hear it or not.

After talking with my friend, I realized why Steve said it. Of course, I’d protect the things we’d worked hard for to be sure our daughters have all they need. But it was also a release of sorts.

He’d already told me to be strong. He’d already told me to continue writing and following my dreams—something he was so proud of me for doing. He was telling me to live life, to continue on, to love.

My friend was quiet on the phone for a minute. “That makes perfect sense.” She hadn’t had the chance to have that kind of heartbreaking conversation with her husband, but she could imagine him saying it to her now.

For me, talking with my friend was like discovering a newness of life. Life continues.

Why am I just now writing about this? Because I woke up Sunday morning with the inspiration to talk about it, finally.

I can’t predict if I’ll ever need to have a prenup. When the right guy comes along and in the right circumstances, I’d consider going out with him. It would have to be on a one-day-at-a-time basis and with the understanding that my kids are always first and that I am who I am because of the last 24 years.

Life is a continuation of things and the constancy of the love for Steve that will never go away. My life has been beautiful so far, and I have a lot to share with the world.

Love and Life are bigger than my little place in the universe and are full of unpredictable surprises.

For now, I’ll just see where the newness of Life leads me.


Waterolor beautiful girl. Vector illustration of woman

Another reason I posted this today is to participate in the Beauty of a Woman (BOAW) blog festival, something August McLaughlin started five years ago.

I hope my post will help other women who’ve been widowed too soon (it’s always too soon!) realize that it’s normal and natural to continue living, to find companionship however it suits their needs, and to know it’s perfectly all right to set expectations that both comfort and protect any new relationships.

Visit August’s BOAW blog post (link is in the paragraph above) for a list of other blogs that are celebrating feminine beauty.

29 comments on… “On Discovering Newness of Life”

  1. So grateful for you and your wisdom. This post brought tears to my eyes. I can see Steve being that practical. And suddenly, I realized how much I miss him. Thank you for bringing him right in close again today. It’s a good time for a visit with my old friend if you know what I mean. Much love to you.

    • Diana Beebe

      Oh, Debra, I do know what you mean. Love you bunches!

  2. Leanne

    Thank you Diana, for writing with such depth about the newness of Life. How sweet, strong and touching. Tears here too. So very grateful for your courage, ability and willingness to share your experiences. Humble thanks.

    • Diana Beebe

      Thank you, Leanne, for your very sweet comment. It means a lot to me.

  3. Pingback: The Beauty of a Woman BlogFest V! #BOAW16 - August McLaughlin

  4. While the advice is practical, I feel a little gut wrenched that you ever have to consider it. I think you are very brave and inspirational. 🙂

    • Diana Beebe

      Nicole, you’re such a great friend! Thank you for always being there for me!

  5. Diana, you are such a strong, beautiful, and wise woman. I am lucky to have had the opportunity to meet you… in real life!! Stay you, whatever you do. Hugs.

    • Diana Beebe

      Thank you, Tiffany! I’m glad we got to meet in real life, too! Thanks for the support. It means a lot. Hugs!

  6. I too belong to the readers admiring you for your strength, your bravery and your wisdom! What an amazing blog post and add to Augusts Blog Fest!

    • Diana Beebe

      Thank you for the kind comments. I’m so glad you stopped by for BOAW!

  7. I can’t fathom all that you’ve been through, Diana. Your husband was a gem, so wise to say those things to you at the time. Loving husband and father.

    I’m happy you’re doing so well. You’re an inspiration to all of us. XO

    • Diana Beebe

      Lynn, thank you! You’ve described him pretty well. I appreciate all the difficult conversations that we did have. I hope this post will help someone else! I’m looking forward to reading your BOAW post.

  8. Oh, Diana – what a brave and poignant post. I can only imagine how many you’ll inspire with its message. Sending loads of love!

    • Diana Beebe

      August, I’m so grateful of the timing with BOAW16 so I could include this post in the blog fest. I hope my posts about my experience will help and inspire others. Thanks for letting me join in at the last minute. {{{Hugs}}}

  9. Regina

    What an example you are for your daughters! How poignant your words for them … and for others. We each have our own way of processing life – the good, the bad, the happy, the sad – you have a gift of words and are now blessed to be able to share those words with the world. I pray that each memory become a smile and the newness of life keeps you open to new opportunities. Thank you for sharing.

    • Diana Beebe

      Regina, thank you for your kind comment and support! And your blessing is just beautiful. <3

  10. Rachel

    Diana, there’s not much else I could add to the perfect comments made above. You know how I feel. I am so blessed by you and Steve. I know that we will continue to walk with Love in all our ways, full of light and joy. Thank you for sharing this beautifully written post. ♡♡♡♡♡

    • Diana Beebe

      Rachel, thank you for always being there for me and the girls. I’m blessed with many amazing and beautiful friends! <3

    • Diana Beebe

      Thank you for the kind comments. I’m glad you stopped by.

  11. Pingback: Beauty and Sexuality Quotes: A #BOAW16 Wrap-up - August McLaughlin

  12. Gah! I could see your sweet face, and hear your voice while I read this, so yes I’m all teary-eyed now. And missing you soooo much!

    How are we coming up on a year for THAT word? It feels like it was yesterday.

    • Diana Beebe

      Jenny, it’s still surreal during certain moments of my day, but I’ve reached a place of real goodness in my life. Sometimes it’s overwhelming and almost unbelievable, but really good. I miss you, too! We need to catch up!

  13. Pingback: The Beauty of the Tapestry of Life | Author Diana Beebe

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